Michael Giudicessi recently retired from the private practice of law. He now serves in a volunteer capacity as legal counsel for the Iowa Freedom of Information Council.
January 15, 2024
Dear Ernest,
We’ve never met.
But, apparently because our last names are similar—though not the same—email perhaps targeted for you ended up in my junk box.
It’s cold here in Iowa today, and with no U.S. Mail arriving due to the MLK holiday, I have been passing the time by reading a few selections that my computer marked as junk.
That’s how I know you may have missed the news from Ted Cruz.
He wrote today (through the National Republican Senatorial Committee) to say his “new book, Unwoke, is all about how the woke mind virus took over America and what conservatives can do to stop it from spreading further.”
Apparently, since “you’re in the top 1% of all conservatives” in New Jersey, the Texas senator “hand-signed a limited number of copies exclusively for the BIGGEST PATRIOTS in the country” and he wants you to order his book.
A senator from Kansas, Roger Marshall, wrote on Saturday to tell you “The emergency at our southern border is UNACCEPTABLE, and the American people are demanding accountability.”
He says your name is missing from the “Official Border Security Petition.”
I don’t know about New Jersey custom, but here in Iowa we don’t use all capital letters in our email, because it seems rather loud.
Mike Pompeo also sent you an email.
He didn’t shout with all caps, but his underlined message was clear: “Please complete your personally assigned Survey to Secure America today.”
That followed his reassurance they need to hear from you “so we can tabulate results and act on the critical information we gain from your time taking the survey.”
Just yesterday, an “Official Survey of Republican Voters” asked for your ranking of Iowa caucus contenders, from one to five. It then listed four candidates.
And the latest emails are most curious.
The one from Senator Marsha Blackburn of Tennessee seemed so ominous I chose not to clink its link inviting me to learn more. Her regarding line said simply, “I wish I had better news to share with you, Ernest.”
At least Blackburn was smiling in the photograph appearing at the end of her message.
The latest arrival said little: “The Iowa Caucus is happening RIGHT NOW.”
It did invite you to participate in an exit poll.
Don’t you find it odd that you received such a request as a New Jersey resident, and no one asked me as an Iowan to do that?
Our cold snap should break tomorrow. Happily, I will go back to deleting junk email without reading it first.
Considering how this nasty weather may move to New Jersey, you might find yourself with a mind to read your junk email.
If any was intended for me, do us both a favor, Ernest, and delete it.
Sincerely,
Mike
Screenshots of emails to “Ernest” from Republican National Senatorial Committee addresses.
